Romantic Friday Writers: First Love

Romantic Friday Writers: First Love

http://fridaynightwriters.blogspot.com/ This blog has a challenge for writers of romance/love stories to write 400 words on a theme each Friday.  The theme this week is Fearful Heart.

This topic is tailor-made for my current story!  Every week I’m finding some way to tie the theme to Kaitlyn and Jason.  What an interesting and different way to grow a new story!  I’m certain that this will get put together and edited and added to Dev Dreams Volume Two when it’s ready.

Last week I even won the featured writer for the week! This makes me very excited. I know the piece needs more work and editing, but winning let me know that I’m on the right track with this story.

Word Count: 326   Full critique is just fine.

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“How was your date?” Cindy asked.  She hopped onto a stool and put her elbows on the bar, grinning at Kaitlyn.

“It was fine,” she answered.  There really hadn’t been anything wrong. It should have been perfect, but the spark was missing.  She put down her small clutch and ran her fingers through her hair, shaking out the careful style.

Cindy sighed.  “It was fine, huh?  You’re not going to see him again, are you?”

Kaitlyn shrugged.  “I doubt it.  I just can’t feel excited about him.”

“Because he’s not Jason.”

Kaitlyn flashed her eyes at Cindy, ready to deny it. But she didn’t say anything.  It was true.  She kept waiting to feel that warm glow that Jason brought to life in her.  She had assumed that it would be easy to find again. Knowing there was one guy who made her feel safe and happy and complete trust meant that there had to be more, right? So far she hadn’t found it.

“You know,” Cindy continued, “First love is always different.  You’re never going to feel anything quite like it again. You get something different, but just as good.  But you’ve got to be willing to let go of this expectation that you have.”

“Right,” Kaitlyn said.  But she couldn’t.  She knew she would never be satisfied with anything less than what she felt around Jason.  If that meant she was going to be alone for the rest of her life, so be it. She didn’t really feel like it was a choice.  Her mind would always compare men to Jason and if none of them ever lived up to him, she wasn’t going to just settle and spend the rest of her life being frustrated that the man she was with didn’t make her feel that rush of love.

Was Cindy right that first love was always different?  Was what Kaitlyn defined as love really something else? Something even more precious and rare?

This story now available on Kindle…

Posted by on Oct 13, 2011 in Friday Excerpt | 16 comments

16 Comments

  1. Margo Benson
    Oct 14, 2011

    Aww…I have high hopes for Kaitlyn and Jason – I hope love wins through in the end! This is lovely and believable, a real scene that most of us have experienced. Well written.

    Congratulations on being Featured Writer last week!

  2. madeleine sara
    Oct 14, 2011

    Awh poor kaitlyn holding out for Jason. I hope things turn out well for her whatever the outcome.

  3. N. R. Williams
    Oct 14, 2011

    To compare first love to all others is something I think we are all guilty of. You captured the doubt your character has over her future happiness. Nice job.
    Nancy
    N. R. Williams, The Treasures of Carmelidrium

  4. Anna's Adornments, Sweden
    Oct 14, 2011

    Lovely text, Ruth. I’m cheering for Jason and Kaitlyn! This feels like a genuine conversation. People talk like this.

    Inspite of what I wrote for this week’s story for ‘First Love’, I really don’t believe that there is anything special about a first love. A first love can even be completely wrong! But these two, Jason and Kaitlyn, seem to be right for each other.

    Thank you for you kind words on my post!
    Best wishes,
    Anna

    For the benefit of other readers:
    Anna’s RFWers’ Challenge No. 23-‘First Love’

    • RuthMadison
      Oct 14, 2011

      Good point! A first love can be wrong!

  5. Francine Howarth
    Oct 14, 2011

    Hi,

    Good natural dialogue here, and Jason’s the one, (as we know) but it’s kind of nice finding out the hell Kaitlyn has to go through before realisation of how it is and how it’s going to be. 😉

    best
    F

  6. RuthMadison
    Oct 14, 2011

    Thanks so much for the comments!

  7. Beverly Diehl
    Oct 14, 2011

    There certainly is peer pressure sometimes, to make us choose a guy (or woman) who truly isn’t right for us. (Or to stay with or leave someone.) You reflect this conflict wonderfully in this conversation.

  8. Kiru Taye
    Oct 14, 2011

    I agree with Beverly. Sometimes we can feel compelled to date someone who isn’t necessarily right for us for whatever reason. I can understand Kaitlyn’s dilemma. Well written, Ruth.

  9. Andy
    Oct 15, 2011

    Hello.
    I enjoyed the dialogue of this…it’s very real for many.
    When you think you’ve found that perfect person who brings sunlight to your life, who makes you dizzy, who you can’t stop thinking about, who makes your heart beat faster every time (s)he looks at you, it’s very hard to give that up for someone else.

    I’ve not been around for the last few weeks of Jason & Kaitlin, but from what I can remember, these two are just right for each other.
    Sometimes, you have to overcome many hurdles to realize this.

    Many belated congratulations on being awarded Featured Writer of the Week for last week! I had a chance to read the entry at RFW, it was awesome!

    The Beauty Of Love.

  10. Adura Ojo
    Oct 15, 2011

    Interesting issues covered here, Ruth. Sometimes one just wishes friends would let us do our own thinking. But we like to know what they think. We can’t help it any more than they can. This is indeed a dilemma for Kaitlyn. Would she follow her heart or follow the lead of her friend? For Kaitlyn, it seems like ‘first love cuts the deepest.’

  11. L'Aussie
    Oct 15, 2011

    Hi Ruth. Loved your story again. Looks like I’m not alone in being taken by your characters Kaitlyn and Jason. They’re very likeable and yet ordinary in a way that’s good. Sometimes in modern stories we read too much about making our characters stand out that they can become unbelievable cardboard cutouts instead of beating hearts as you have captured in these two. Keep going. I love how you use them to follow the weekly themes.

    Denise

  12. L'Aussie
    Oct 17, 2011

    Hi Ruth, back for my second pass. I look forward to reading your stories each week and I loved the discussion here between Cindy and Kaitlin.

    Denise

  13. Sarcasm Goddess
    Oct 21, 2011

    Okay, where is the rest of this story! I must read more. And I agree with Cindy, there is nothing like your first love…but it doesn’t mean there isn’t something better.

    Great story! Loved it!

    • RuthMadison
      Oct 21, 2011

      🙂 There’s several other bits of it sprinkled through the last few weeks of RFW, though they are out of order

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